The World - According to Catzilla Herself
Dolly Fun Home
Catzilla Home
Perhaps that is a worthy occupation of my time - the universe is quite in need of WISDOM.
I have sharpened my claws and a pencil or two and have spent a good amount of time MUSING. I will write.
As time goes by, then, my UNIQUE perceptions will be saved and archived.
More To Come ...
For a time I lived in a universe where I reigned SUPREME. I was the only feline within my vast queendom, which was only RIGHTLY SO as cats are the pinnacle of evolution, and I am the ULTIMATE. To those unacquainted, you might think me vain. However, I am merely stating facts - no more - no less. There were numerous other two leg and four leg denizens of those lands, most quite a bit larger. What they possessed in size however, was inadequate compensation for what they lacked in CLEVERNESS. or PERCEPTION. ...
I am told I was born to a more lowly station in life. However, this I do not recall - other than anxiety during thunderstorms, very little can be validated by my memory. I am told by the Elsie-Cat that I was a little black kitten - born free and natural - and lived with my littermates in a city park. This sounds rather romantic. As the story goes, we were caught in a surprise spring thundershower and scattered for shelter among the yards at the edge of the park. At the end of the rain, I was ALONE and WET. I broadcast my distress on the loudest vocal setting I could muster. What I probably expected was to be re-united with my cat clan and go on as before. This did not happen. I did encounter a largeish strange two-leg creature, who happened to be intelligent and multi-lingual. I was WISE in usually being very hesitant to approach strange creatures, but this one spoke mommycat fluently. All wee kitties know that those who speak mommycat have ANSWERS. I ran up to her, and was rewarded with a toweling off and a little snack. Then this interesting creature went inside the brick house adjacent to this yard.
I am told that this was a turning point in my life. As I only am dimly aware of this early time, I would have to assume that the outcome was only a result of exercising my superior SENSIBILITY. As none of my littermates had the presence of mind to come back, I stayed put on the stone step. My intuition was correct - the interesting two-leg creature did reappear and I went sashaying right up. I adopted her as my factotum plenipotentiary, thinking that an intelligent multilingual creature might train more easily than one of limited perception.
One the whole, it was a very satisfactory decision. As plenipotentates go, the Elsie-Cat is a cut above average. She speaks American English, Mexican Spanish, and Cat fairly fluently. Although it should be noted that I have little use for services in the Spanish language area. She understands subtle differences, for instance - why I like to drink water fresh out of the tap, rather than from a fully filled bowl that has been sitting out. If more than can be drunk at a sitting is put out - it just becomes OLD. Old water in a pinch will do - and certainly seems very satisfactory to the numerous creatures of lower station in my universe. However, fresh cold water is my DUE, and I do not need to ask - only give the slightest indication by a glance in the direction of the faucet and it is UNDERSTOOD. I am served a select portion of fresh spring water right from the chilled bottle. Not too much - not too little. Just enough. And preferably in a nice glass custard cup. Anticipation and prompt service with a touch of style - two characteristics that signify that as factotums go, the Elsie-Cat IS a cut above average.
More later on my life in the Queendom ...
However it is time for my serious sleep
